So what's new .....
- Been on my computer much lately ..... so my right arm is acting up again ..... hence the long delays in posting ..... I need tuh get off (dis computer) and take a rest ......
- My camera is driving me nuts ..... cuz now that I've learnt how tuh post videos ..... I just discovered ..... dat de audio eh all dat ..... yuh cyah hear shit on anyting I record!!!
- Found out yesterday ...... dat TSTT is now charging $5 for a reprint of a phone bill ..... WTF? ..... I never got de original in de first place!!!
- In a fit of boredom ...... ah went tuh see Valentine's Day ..... and I cried ...... it was such a nice movie ..... and EVERYBODY in it ..... is ah star ..... it eh have no plebs .....
- Clearly Mummy Dove reads my blog ..... cuz she came back about two days after I wrote about her ..... however ...... the lone egg is now on the opposite side of the nest ...... with a hole in it ...... and Mummy Dove is MIA again ..... and Baby Dove is non-existent!
- Crime still payin apparently ....
- Kamla is the first female Opposition Leader to be appointed ....... you go girl!!
- Basdeo is now sitting on de back bench in Parliament ...... who cares!
- PM Manning has reached a new level of disgusting with his church bamboozlement .....
- We lose de cricket on Sunday (TnT vs Zimbabwe) ..... OK OK ..... so dat eh new!
- Toyota have Customer Appreciation Discount dis month (and last month too) ...... yes ...... ah whole 20% off parts and service ..... someting I never experience before in my 5 years of drivin ah Toyota ...... yuh see what ah lil RECALL could do!!!
Anyway ..... as ah say ..... meh arm zorcin ...... an' ah cyah really type too much ..... so fuh now ..... ah go leave yuh with some newspaper foolishness ..... which by de way ..... eh nuttin NEW!
STEUPS ..... it eh have NO thrill ..... dat lasting only 10 minutes ...... dat could get my $200!!!
What dem really lookin for ...... ah Maid ....... or ah Woman ....... cuz what de heck is ah 'Maid Companion' ...... an' why de nex one hadda be 'YOUNG ATTRACTIVE'???
Grrrrrr??? ..... in Trinidad??? .... anyway Mr and Miss ..... if yuh plannin tuh go tuh de screenin ..... remember tuh brush up on yuh ..... "playin hide and seek wit trees while singing love songs" skills!!! ..... cuz that's sure tuh come up in de audition!
...... and then what ..... do I get your 'make thousands weekly' magic powers over the phone .....
First tuh begin ...... 'WE GIVES CERTIFICATE' ...... suggests tuh me ..... that the writer of this ad ...... was NOT given a certificate in English ..... and second tuh continue ..... 'CERTIFIED TELEMARKETERS' ..... suggests tuh me ..... dat yuh could actually become 'certified' in dat shit ..... but really an' truly ...... what is this ad about ..... anybody? ...... anybody? 
Who need dis shit ..... when we have de STAMINA MAN ...... Trevor Sayers ...... on top ah dat ..... de Chinese already have dat LITTLE stigma when it comes tuh sex ..... so would anybody really trust their sex herbs ...... btw ...... what is female impotence?
Yuh ever hear dat dotish ad on de radio ...... where de gyul does say "so you don't have tuh be at a LOST" ...... well guess what ..... right now ..... dat ad have me ..... AT A LOST ...... cuz what de heck is Dinner Plated ..... is that like something coated with Dinner ..... and what is Black/White Cutleries? ...... is Cutleries even a word?
I said, a hip hop the hippie the hippie
To the hip hip hop, a you don't stop
The rock it to the bang, bang boogie
Say up jumped the boogie
To the rhythm of the boogie, the beat ...
"If you can't afford us, well don't call us - Only for the elite and important" ...... HELLO .... in Trini ..... if yuh ELITE and IMPORTANT ...... yuh could get ah @#$%& FUH FREE!!!
Why 26 bwoy ..... is 26 the legal punch makin age ...... an' why yuh hadda be HONEST tuh make punch ..... wha ..... yuh go cheat on de milk ..... and LOL ...... MUST NEED A JOB AND NOT WANT! ...... love it!! 
Wait a minute ..... someone paid for an ad ...... tuh give away chicken manure FREE ...... sounds like dey really lookin fuh ah FREE chicken coop cleanout! ..... which brings me tuh another point ...... how many chickens ....... you hadda have ...... tuh be able tuh gather up enough chicken shit ...... tuh be able tuh put out an ad ..... tuh give it way free??!!! ..... da'is rel chicken shit bwoy!
Steups ..... I smell ah PLACEBO!! ...... this ad woulda been more effective on ..... persons born yesterday ...... or those who went tuh school in August ...... not ones who could actually read ah papers!
OMG ..... this is so true ..... I think I'll call when ah done pick up meh chicken shit ..... cuz yeah ..... who else would you want to talk to ..... if you knew that ...... tomorrow may never come!???
What de heck is dis ...... yuh could SCRUB away yuh age now????
OK ..... clearly Woodzy was a lil woozy ..... when he was writin dis ad ....... cuz HELLO ....... ages 4??? (learn to ride Motorcycle) ..... to 99 ...... an' wha happen tuh peeps over 99???
WOW ...... PH ads still runnin??? ...... even tho Mr. Colm Imbert come an' say dat PH Drivers could now be fined $8000!
A A ..... remember Phatty Poonks (from meh last Trini Classifieds post) ..... well look she in Tobago dis week! ...... ahhhppppps Tobago goin' an' get it nice!!
PANDIT ..... PUNDIT ..... PUNDITH ...... are those like different levels of Punditry?
What a name ...... an' is real role-players dey need bwoy!
LOL ..... down tuh de burglar proof an' all sellin!!!
Did this ad end up in de wrong century ...... who does use typewriters anymore ...... worse again ah manual one?!
Lawd .... the irony of doing someting tuh beautify yuhself ..... but then going out in public while still "in transit" ......
LOL .... first time ah ever hear dis excuse ..... de man say ..... he buy in bulk one time ..... tuh avoid de risk of gettin ketch every minute!
EH ..... first time ah ever see someting like dis ..... gangsters surrenderin!!
WOW ..... another first ...... Westmoorings AND Goodwood Park ...... make ah jail!!!
LOL .... Trini Pohlice again ..... dey give people traffic ticket ..... an' dey eh put no name or car number on de ticket ..... 
Oh gorm ...... FUH REAL ...... dah heat killin we!!
Duh ...... wit a slogan like ...... JUST DO IT ...... of course NIKE would say is OK fuh Tiger tuh take ah BREAK!
I realise ...... real people doh know when tuh use ...... LOSE ...... and LOOSE ..... cuz de amount ah times I does see LOOSE ..... when is really LOSE dey want tuh say ..... 
Ah wonder if WASA know bout dis?
Oh gorm Guardian ...... two typos ...... one bad enough!!!
EH???? ...... Question Mark???? ..... where dat come from???
What is a Menopause Test ..... does it tell you that you have The Menopause ...... cuz I thought you'd pretty much know when it arrives!
OK ..... this is another confusing ad ...... what is Passport Training? ...... I mean like why is a private company advertising Passport Training .... don't you learn dat shit when yuh workin in de Passport Office??
Come on Pizza Hut .... is WHET ...... not Wet!
At Playdium ..... where ADMISSONED is absolutely Free Free Free ...... you get to experience mind blowing games NEVER seen elsewhere ..... like BOWLING??? ..... didn't we use tuh have bowling in South once?!
Could they have worded this NOTICE any clumsier?!
I so have Zero tuh say about this ..... just go out ..... and buy yuh Hardcover ...... or yuh Paperback ...... and learn all about how Jack went from Zero ..... to Hero! ...... altho ....... de book I really want tuh get ..... is de one on how he went from Zero ...... tuh Zillionaire!
Wha ..... West Bees have shopping ISLES?? 
What is a "Trini" Shower Mixer? ...... steups ...... de ad was goin good ...... until dey put eeeeen dat "Trini" in it!
Grrrrrrrrr????
Ah wonder if dis could work fuh some of de human animals dat runnin ah mock out dere?!
NUFF SAID!!!
L M A O
love it! haha, dat was a good laugh for the week.
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JJ gyul ..... it funny fuh real ..... dat our daily REALITY ..... does always be playin off as COMEDY!!!
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Well better to laugh dan cry eh...
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'ow much fuh ah lotto ticket now?
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fuh you ..... is only bout 50 pee ...... which givin yuh two chances ..... yuh cyah go wrong ...... well .... unless yuh buy de wrong ticket
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Scene, this is your longest post yet and you are doing the country well with your keen observations that most of us missed, or is it mist
You are documenting the amount of stupidity that is now running rampant in our country - it's not just the government who has the monopoly on being stupid and ignorant.
This post is too long for one comment and I will get back to this post after I finish my doubles rapping practice session and those interviews of the scores of pretty candidates who applied to be my companion while currying my duck
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ah make it long fuh spite .... jus so ah doh hadda say nuttin fuh de ress ah de week ......
an' wheeyyy ...... ah watchin yuh slight (like pepper) ...... I didn't know you's ah Doubles Rapper ..... wuz yuh sobriquet ..... $3 and 50 CENT?!
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MY MONEY HA HA!............If I ever play!
LOL too much shit to comment on just 1! hope these did not come from one particular newspaper b/c they could save money by giving my 6 yr. old daughter a job! Its not educated adults making these mistakes!
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CK .... wha yuh mean "If I ever play!" ...... yuh ever hear ..... If yuh doh have ah ticket, yuh doh have ah chance!
.... and no .... dat compilation of shit came from a few Express and Newsday ...... and maybe one Guardian ..... cuz ah does get Guardian only on weekends ..... so could you imagine if ah used tuh get Guardian every day too ..... lawd ...... it woulda be triple de shit!
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scene this too long to comment on how you had me rolling...
PLEA is some ppl from Point Lisas whatever whatever.. and the Passport is something that the Oil & Gas industry has in order for you to get to wukk on their plants and platforms... it eh the whole kit an kaboodle buh is a lil training ting dat yuh does get a sustificate upon successful completion.. FYI...
i hope i did it some justice.. jus learning yuh something for your learning me about dem PANDITS and PUNDIT(h)s...
oh yeah isnt female impotence called frigidity...
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bandi boy ..... I so glad you does read dis blog eh ...... you and Jumbie ...... cuz allyuh does real clue me eeeeen ...... tanks eh ..... cuz dat passport scene had me real confused fuh tru .....
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Oh gorm, ah have tuh deal with this post in stages. Right now, like aka lol, I working on refining meh doubles rapping skills. Ah might even throw in ah beat box something to get de edge on him. Ah gorn!
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LOL .... beat box ..... people does still do dat
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well i doh physically beat it buh dem chirren might call it dat...
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LOL ...... ah wonder if we talkin about de same ting
.... but hear dis nah ..... I jus finish readin today's papers ...... and look what I see in it ....... if ah had wait one more day ..... ah woulda been clued in ......
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so one went missing ..... then the other one got a hole ..... dat is one delinquent mummy dove!
Toyota finally break dey silence ..... tuh say what we done ahready figure out long time!
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And I should believe this why? Isn't this the same company that initially denied there was a problem in the first place? The parts in my Toyota different how? They were made by a different company using a different design? So tell me did they make different designs of accelerator pedals for each car depending on which country the car was to be sold? I want dem to explain to me EXACTLY how the acelerator pedal different. A photo of a US one and a Trini one wouldn't hurt plus I could then get my brother who is an auto mechanic to check my car to make sure because I sure don't trust them.
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girl is really more questions than answers .....
..... ah see aka_lol have ah directlink tuh Toyota Japan on his blog ..... maybe you should check it out ..... and submit all ah dem same questions!
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Harumi from Toyota had to list all he subdivisions dey yes.
Hear nah scene, I hold meh belly and bawl reading this. 26 to make punch?! Must need, not want?!
I cyah even comment on the ress. I still too weak.
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gyul hear nah ..... dat 26 jokey fuh more reasons dan one ...... cuz you would swear de job is tuh be ah security officer or sumtin ..... where yuh age would actually matter ..... den why 26 ..... why not 25 ...... cuz yuh know normally tings does go in increments of 5 ..... like when somebody ask yuh de time ...... an' yuh say 10 pass .......or 20 pass ....... but 26?? ....... dis one real crack me up too!
..... anyway ...... I out ...... cuz right now ...... I'm NEEDing and WANTing some punch (Supligen Peanut punch tuh be exact)
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I real laugh after reading that post. It make my week. The best part for me is the man that buy his weed in bulk so he won't get caught and he still get hold by police and I just luv 'phatty poonks' name. She must be making a killing...lol
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..... yeah ..... dat whole story is kix ..... cuz is clear as day ...... dat de man is a pusher man ...... but of course he couldn't admit dat ..... cuz it woulda make his sentence greater ...... so he try tuh bamboozle de judge wit dat 'bulk buyin' foolishness ...... LOL ...... ganja excuses never cease tuh amuse ....... they are ALWAYS stupid!!!
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a whole lot here to read - had to hold in the laughs as I am still at a meeting at 6.34 pm...
But Pizza Hut like they make that poster inhouse - they ask the driver or somebody who had some free time? Because if they PAID someone to write that copy - with "wet your appetite" and "Stuff Crust" not stuffED crust...I would sue...
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Aye Chennette ..... Welcome tuh de scene
...... an' doh start meh on dat 'ED' ...... you know how many times I does see official menus wit 'ED' missin!!
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